Abundance

It’s like losing the one thing you love the most
It’s like unknowingly throwing away your hope
It’s like having happiness turned into grief

Abundance you have forsaken
Abundance you have forgotten

With kisses to your heart
With flutters to your soul
With music in your living

Abundance is a gift
Abundance is from God

Like tears falling from your face
Like Gods amazing grace
Like mercy

Abundance is love
Abundance is without lack

Never leaving
Never not hoping
Never stopping and
Never not knowing
that God’s Abundance
Never leaves your side.

¡pWrite…All she can be

Life is good. For that I, indeed, give all honor and praise to God. It’s the holiday season which means time for family and friends, fellowship and chillin’; it means more love and holiday cheer with hearts of thanksgiving, that is the holiday season. I’ve been blessed with the opportunity to see what a strong, beautiful woman does every day as a wife and a mother. Let me tell you she is amazing. To see a mother so in love with her children is amazing. And my goodness does she have such long days (though filled with love LONG).

Have you ever wondered how early your mother rose to prepare for you and your siblings day? This particular woman is up at 4am for yoga and meditation, praise and worship. From there it’s straight into the kitchen to start preparations for the family’s day. There’s so much team work in this family it’s a joy to witness. But it’s only 3pm and as I’ve been in rotation with her this morning I have to say I am worn out already and it’s only 3pm (thou my body thinks it’s 6pm, which means I was really not up until 7am). I digress, being a mother and a wife is hard work and long hours but it is also full of bliss, joy, tons of small moments and pure love…

Thank God for my BFF! a Great Friend, Mother and Wife.

¡pWrite…Thanksgiving

Today is a day where everyone across the nation (hopefully) gives thanks for all of the good and bad that has occurred in their lives—or maybe just thanks because their family gets to have a hot meal when they would otherwise lack. Today I give thanks for all of the great that God is doing in my life. Today I give thanks for the strength and courage to make change in my life. Today I give thanks that I get to travel home for christmas to be with my friends and family. Today I give thanks for Sonya Renee and her R.U.H.C.U.S. movement.

Today I give thanks with a grateful heart for God has been blessing me continually. I’ve accomplished so much this year and there is more to accomplish before the year ends. I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving filled with love, happiness and hope God Bless you all.

Now I see.

I have truly let you go
I see the light, for the
Tunnel is bright, not
Dimly lit, it shines
Smiling on all of the
Great time we spent
The good times we
Shared…the love we
Dared.

I close my eyes and
See your image, my
Minds eye, vivid—all
That is you and I…I mean
All that was you and I
See it flash within my
Eyes—deeply I smile

I let go of the hope
To one day be your
Wife, it does not seem
That would be our
Destiny—in love I let
Go but I’ll always
Love you so—I once
Upon a time wished
You to be the one.

I once upon a time
Wished that I would
Be for you, as you to me,
I held long onto
That dream, I held
Tight for all hopes
That one day it might
Actually be.

Then reality you see
Knocked me down,
Down right to my
Knees, yelling at me
To see, with tears
In my eyes I finally
Understood why.

I need love you see.
To hear it, to feel it
To see it, to touch it
I need assurance
That our love is
True between you
And me…I needed
To hear that you loved
Me…I needed consistency
I needed you to love me.
NO. I needed you to be open
To showing me, and yes! Telling
Me, unconditionally how
Much you loved me.

Patient I was, patient I
Tried, tears weld up,
Falling from my eyes
I held on, I held on, I let go
But still I held on…hoping
Too hard, that this wasn’t our
Reality, hoping too hard
There would still be a
You and me…now knowing,
I let go…now opening my
Eyes to see…I understand.

Before reluctantly, even
Hesitantly, now with
Confidence and peace
Now with love and peace
Now understanding it
Was the past that shared
Me and you. Now I see.

 

**Thursday Poetry Rally: Week 57**

Hiding Inside.

for so long, I allowed
my youth to wreck
my nerves—allowed
your drug use to
self-induce my emotions
into a dark-ness, a dark
abyss of pity and
doubt, clouds of unrest
from un-want, dis-trust and
lack of love–
i built a cave and
tucked my heart
deep deep inside
away from you–
my mother!–NO MORE
pain will you inflict
your drug bull-shit
makes me so sick—
feelings from youth
I’ve always held so
deep inside–allowing
pain and hurt to reign
as pride, while all this
time, I was really, just–
hiding inside…

¡pWrite…Blessed.

It’s been a while since I’ve actually posted a pwrite. Heck it’s been just as long since I’ve consistently posted any poetry. I’ve been busy with school and on this RUHCUS Journey which has been so amazing and on time for my spirit. I serve an awesome God and my God is ALWAYS on time with what/who I need in my life. Or for that matter what/who I don’t need in my life. And what I don’t need is the burdened feelings I have and had been carrying around for decades because I didn’t know what to do with them–so it’s amazing to get the opportunity to FREE myself and heal. For those of you who may be like what is a R.U.H.C.U.S. it’s a movement. It stands for Radically Unapologetic Healing Challenge 4 US. It’s part of the Body is Not An Apology Movement–a movement founded by Poet Activist Sonya Renee. This woman has a calling on her spirit and she is fulfilling her destiny on God’s terms. Anyhow, “Christmas break” is approaching and I plan to have a long and delightful break so hopefully I will be able to re-center and focus in my poetry craft.

Come Back.

You left us…here you are no more
the pain you felt, the bruises that
never seemed to go away.

Your forever feelings of being tired
the lack it last no more as the
leukemia war is a war for you no more

Granny come back. Aches my heart
in the space where your physical being
has always lived. Granny come back
so the tears last no more.

My future kids will not be blessed
with meeting you. Your stories I
will share, of my grandmother bold
and yes she always did dare. To defy
the odds and trick the obstacles
to bend the circumstance, just so
that I could have every chance.

I love you granny. Forever and
always. I love you granny, forever
in my heart you will always stay.
I love you granny. And I’m glad
your pain is now gone away. I love
you granny. Forever may your
soul rest in sweet heavenly peace.

FREE

I would be free from the tears I sob
I would be free of the shame I built
So deep inside –I would let
Go and be FREE from the concept
That my mother did not want me,
FREE from the thought that my mother
Was able to lie to me, so ea-si-ly, because
Clearly she was not able to love me –ENOUGH—
But with understanding all my
Tears have shed and dried away,
The burden and pain from carrying
Heavy choices, never my choices to make
Burden now bared, freed from weights
Pinning my shoulders to a hunch
While constantly pinching at my heart
FREE
FREE
FREE these burdens, no loner with me
I’m FREE

Not–Spent

I am sad, but coping
For soon I will lose you. 
I cry for your pain
And pray God takes all
Your pain pain away
Leaving us with the smile
Rested upon your face…

Due to failed attempts
Of our love, I could of
Sworn was heaven sent
Has ultimately been washed
Away likely to never return
But what’s done will be
And is already done
The door I closed and
Finally walked away…

Two different events, alike
And not similar, but tears 
For both I cried– asking
“dear God, why?”
My dear sweet granny, 
To heaven she will go
For the God I know she
Too knows and for his
Love kept quiet, causing
Doubtful riots–from there
It came and went leaving
Me longing for time before spent. 

¡pWrite…yogi?

I’m once again in the library on my grind. I’m taking a short break so I decided to write. This will be short and sweet 🙂 I’m gaining much momentum in this thing called life as I make plans, execute them and remove them from my list of things to do. I have been going to yoga courtesy of this living social deal that was 15 classes for $15 and when I first started going can I say it was like death trying to get those dang poses and stretches and now I’m getting better and stronger! I might just be ready to venture off on my own once I’m finished with the classes from the deal. Today I was in there sweating my life away asking myself if it was due to the fact that an hour before I had some coffee…either way after yoga is over the stress is always gone from my shoulders–which is wear I hold stress…I’ve not had any true motivation to write any poetry but hopefully the motivation will come back…it’s hard for me to write and channel my emotions to write when my life feels at peace.

Peace & Blessing

Nature…

Green pastures sing melodic
Tunes as winds blow allowing
Rainbows to overflow, stars
Sparkle, illuminating mothers
Earths spectacular gifts, nature
Thrives while chipmunks pry
Through lens un-captured should
Be no ducks surprise, while fawns
Chill on lawns with flowers hiding
Smells of skunks masked by the
Masses of flowers while the world
Continues to go un-stirred by
The beauty that is nature…

Let the R.U.H.C.U.S Begin

I’m very excited about the experiences of the day.  I learned a wealth of information —about myself.  I’m not sure if any of you are familiar with Sonya Renee—she’s an awesome spoken word activist.  She’s started a movement called…RUHCUS=Radically Unapologetic Healing Challenge for US.  [When you have a moment check out her youtube.com channel: http://www.youtube.com/user/soniekisses She has a pretty amazing testimony and a true talent for the craft [poetry], I got the opportunity to hear her perform and speak about the RUHCUS movement and I have to admit that I am beyond moved and inspired to help others feel inspired.  I plan to start my own RUHCUS, which, is very scary…I won’t be posting the videos on this blog I will be posting them on Peach Pit Pieces on tumblr & my youtube channel Peach Pit. –It’s amazing how when you don’t listen to God speaking to you [because you’re not ready to hear the message] that somehow you end up doing exactly what was laid on your spirit to do—but wouldn’t allow yourself any chance to do it.  That was me—knowing God had given me an amazing testimony and feeling like why should I share my story…that type of vulnerability is never something I allow myself to tap into, certainly for my own selfish reasons.  Then I didn’t know how to completely heal but after today I see that I am ready and it’s time to help others use their voice.

You can also find more about RUHCUS on FB…just search it will come up…(tho you may have to be added to the group).

PLEASE NOTE that I wrote this on 09.24.2011 (just late to post it)

¡pWrite…Welcome Home

I’m so tired right now…my allergies have been kicking my but since Oct. 1…thank goodness it wasn’t on my birthday that I was feeling like this–I wonder if I have an allergy cold.  If I wasn’t sure before I am definitely sure now that I am full throttle in the the 5th cycle of 7…let me repeat that just in case you missed it…I’m in the 5th cycle of 7 [Devine Interventions 7:11].  It’s an amazing new cycle and I’m learning to be more “obedient” in the sense of being disciplined and aware of God’s presence in and through my life.  Tonight I went to CAYA–which is a young adults celebration (church service) for ages 18-40 years old and it only happens once a month.  The visiting reverend tonight was amazing!  I messed around and joined the church!  (welcome HOME to me)–that’s how awesome this man of God was…he preached about David and Goliath but that wasn’t the start of it…we started in 1 Samuel 16 where the story talks about David being anointed and then going back to the field. The overal message was around us being obedient to God and recognizing that our opportunities in God are often masqueraded in opposition/adversity.  It’s so real if you think about it…when do you learn the most? When your faith is being tested, right? RIGHT! Anyway I’m going to take my tail to sleep…my next pWrite will be about R.U.H.C.U.S (Radically Unapologetic Healing Challenge 4 US)…until my next journey begins peace and blessing upon you all.

Love…Ms. Peaches

¡pWrite…blessings

All praises to God! I am so blessed. Sometimes we lose sight of our blessings –I mean the simple blessings–like being able to see, being able to speak, being able to chew, to think…clearly that list can go on and on and on. I am a master piece in progress and when God is done with me the entire world will be able to see the art that is me. I am in love with all of the new opportunities that I am able to experience and one day I’ll be in love with more than just experiences (wink). Today started term 3 of grad school and I’m still very excited as I take this journey head on. This term I will have to be on a more clearly defined study schedule than last term because this professor does not have a grace period like the last professor did–which is probably not a good idea. I found that knowing I had an extra 2-3 days to get an assignment in I generally took advantage of those extra days. The new professor has awesome credentials and I hope those credentials prove her to be an awesome “teacher.” As my adventures continue I hope to get to attend many more conferences on progressive activism it’s a new learn experience and amazing networking opportunity…and yay for the National Counsel of Negro Women’s 1st Annual Health Summit…I hope to learn a lot at this event.

Free (Poetry Potluck wk 45)

In life I am free…I am free
I am free, naturally by nature
I am free to smile, I am free to
Love, free to laugh and never
Cry, free to live and not die
Naturally nature has set me free
Allowing me to be the person
I love most to be, through
Troubles and fears, hiding
Behind a mask, running from
Misery trying to find your joy
I stop to look back at yesterday
Realizing that the troubles of
Another day are not today and
I am free to know that I can
Smile for I am free…laughter
So loud it roars like thunder
Smile so bright it’s been mistaken
For God’s illuminating life…
Naturally by nature life has given
Me love so free I’m abound by
Hope to and free, free to life my
Hands, free to scream at the mountain
Tops…thank you God…Amen.